Youth Ministry Rethink Part I

I am compelled to do a complete ministry rethink. Not to rethink whether or not I should be in ministry (that one is clearly written out for me. see: the Bible) but How I do ministry.
Disclaimer: Please understand that I am not trying to be critical of any one person this is just a collection of my thoughts from experience.
The number one problem with youth ministry is not what most people think it is: youth. The number one problem with youth ministry is quite the opposite: adults or should I say lack thereof. What I don't understand is the lack of commitment on the part of the Church (notice the capitol "C") It seems to me that the conventional approach to youth ministry is flawed and ineffective. So let me describe to you my idea of conventional youth ministry just so you understand where I am coming from.
Conventional Youth Ministry
I define it as a simple equation: 1 youth pastor + a bunch of teenagers = youth ministry. According to this model all you have to do is get those elements in the same room for any amount of time and youth ministry occurs. What you really end up with is a roomful of disallusioned, bored and burned out people. There are too many problems involved with this model. Here is the short list:
Unrealistic expectations-
Generally speaking a youth pastor ends up being someone with too much education and not enough experience in ministry put into an impossible situation. What we expect him to produce is unrealistic and unfair to any one person.
Too many times I have been told "If you could just connect with my student* I know you could fix them. (*son, daughter, brother, sister, niece, nieghbor, you name it.) I'm sorry but God has not called me to "fix" people, in fact he hasn't called anyone to fix anybody else, only God can heal what is broken in these kids. All too often we expect this unwitting individual to reach out to unsaved kids, disciple the churched kids, provide an atmosphere that the church is comfortable with for the kids, be available at all hours for counsel, meetings and church suppers, services, don't forget preaching when the real pastor is out of town, the list goes on and on. Meanwhile this poor shmuck is alienated from his wife, which the church also expects to be fully committed to the ministry of the church, his kids if he has been so blessed and his extended family who are probably still mad because he moved away in the first place.
If anyone reading this knows me and knows my life, please don't take this as just another life's not fair rant. Even though this may sound familiar to you I bet it sounds really familiar to the poor guy across the country who has gone through this same ringer in youth ministry.
Ok well maybe unrealistic expectations IS the short list. I wonder how many "one-man show" youth ministries there are out there. How many of these poor guys are on the edge of burnout? Is it responsible for the Church to allow our ministers to live like this?
Hopefully by now you are asking the question in your mind "So what do you suggest?" If you are not asking that question and instead asking "So, what's your point?" I would encourage you to apply for the next available youth ministry job opening and see how you like it...
Sorry, back on task-
Here is what I suggest: Church, it's time to wake up and start acting like the Church. Uh huh... So can you be a little less specific? Here are Paul's words to Titus:
"You must teach what is in accord with sound doctrine. Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. In everything set them a good example by doing what is good.
Paul is very clear that this is not a one-man operation. The conventional model of youth ministry is a "para-church club" model built in the 1950's I want to work in a "Church" model built in the first century. The trouble is Christians need to take time out of their overloaded schedules and spend it with a learner. Maybe the learners are your own children, if they are grown then find a teen that needs a friend, I guarantee they are out there!
The trouble is the ratio-
In the conventional model the ratio of teens to teachers is probably 15-20 to 1. Research proves that people cannot maintain healthy, growing relationships with more than six people. So who are your six? (sounds like a cell phone commercial!) I hope one is your spouse, one is your own mentor, got kids? How many spots are left? If you are thinking "well, between my wife, kids and mentor I only have two spots left!" Welcome to my world. The difference being if you are not engaged in conventional youth ministry no one is expecting any more from you. I have one wife, three kids, one mentor and room for only one more HEALTHY relationship and 15-20 teens looking to get into that spot. Your scenario is probably not much different than mine and if the whole Church would take the chance to fill those one or two spots with a young person just imagine what the Church would look like!